Every child who enters an orphanage comes from a family—a family who needs help and could provide care if the money spent on adoption was used to uplift and rebuild the family. Many parents in other countries perceive orphanages to be community centers, boarding schools, temporary housing, hostels, hospitals. Do not assume that the children in orphanages do not have families outside of the orphanages. Many of the parents place their children in these community centers for daycare or even monthly care in order to get their finances in order. They expect their children to be there when they return.
#1. Respect the child. Respect the child’s parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins. Respect the child’s country of birth. No longer allow for children to be reduced to degrading labels such as “backwash of war, the outcasts of society.” In the past pastors reserved children for themselves. Reserving children for adoption is unethical and disrespects the Indigenous family.
#2. Just because the child is given a piece of paper called “Certificate of Orphanhood” does not mean they have been orphaned. Just because facilitators write “orphan” on a piece of paper does not mean it is ethical or moral to remove that child from his home, or make a profit from filling out paperwork. If a child has accompanying paperwork, this still does not mean the child is lacking a family.
#3. Just like it is against the law for parents to receive money in exchange of their child, it should also be against the law for facilitators to receive money for exchanging children and falsifying paperwork.
#4. Stop verbally attacking, bullying and ousting whistleblowers and informed adopted people. Stop calling people who care as having “devilish schemes” or of being anti adoption. Acknowledge the problem. Denial only delays solutions. These families deserve to be heard. NOW.
Learn about adoption and get ahead of the game. Discover what past and present adopted people are thinking and saying. Find out where adoption has been and where it’s headed. Be aware of the individuals who spearheaded adoption. Find out how other adopted people have coped throughout history and globally. Learn the difference between adoption and adoption trafficking. Armed with this data you will be much more confident when discussing adoption politics and you’ll be able to speak to anyone on the topic.
For centuries children have been hurt from unnecessary separations, abandonment by religious authorities and even abduction. These victims have been ignored and their experiences have yet to be acknowledged or explored. In fact, some children into adulthood continue to blame themselves or feel guilty and ashamed for not being 100% positive all the time about their displacements set up under the guise of “child protection”. Before more families are hurt, this issue needs to be addressed at the deepest and highest levels.
It is time to deconstruct this man-made social engineering founded upon poor judgments, assumptions, accusations, stigmas and disrespectful opinions against certain groups of people.
If you are a young woman who finds yourself unexpectedly pregnant, please remember the words of an orphan migrant without his mother from Britain:
“The only woman I have wanted to find, desperately wanted to find, the one I have always wanted to hold me, and hug me, is my mother. That emptiness has been with me all my life.”
Or the father from China,
“If I ever find my daughter, I would tell her how badly I’ve longed for her. I want to let her know that I didn’t give her up for adoption. She was stolen from me.”
And remember the message from my elder friend from Germany:
“If all you do in your life is to raise your children, you have done enough.”
On Behalf of Truth and Transparency,
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